Tiger Woods' Holiday Poem
"Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house,
Came Tiger a flyin', while chased by his spouse.
She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,
'Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.
He’d cheated on Elin, and the story progressed.
Gal after gal stepped up and confessed.
He’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,
With Joselyn, and Kalika . . . The world heard the story.
From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,
Tiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.
With hostesses & waitresses, he had lots of sex,
When not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.
Despite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',
Tiger’s wife went and bought a new home in Sweden.
And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,
"If you’re getting laid? Then I’m getting paid."
No, she’s not pouting, she's full of good cheer.
Her pre-nup made Christmas come early this year
'Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.
He’d cheated on Elin, and the story progressed.
Gal after gal stepped up and confessed.
He’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,
With Joselyn, and Kalika . . . The world heard the story.
From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,
Tiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.
With hostesses & waitresses, he had lots of sex,
When not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.
Despite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',
Tiger’s wife went and bought a new home in Sweden.
And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,
"If you’re getting laid? Then I’m getting paid."
No, she’s not pouting, she's full of good cheer.
Her pre-nup made Christmas come early this year
Tiger Woods ameanguka vibaya. Mtaona hao wazungu watamaliza hela yake. Kataka mwenyewe!
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